Hi everyone I hope to find you all very well!
A reader of my blog this week sent to me a really interesting question. I try to prepare myself every day better for this question. So, let’s see her question about how to deal with the unexpected, which does not necessarily mean something negative.
Chante’s question, by its very nature, demonstrates that she is aware of the surprise effect. We should all be aware of this effect relating to everything in life, not only our projects but specially personal relationships, finances, and so on. This is something that I learned through pain, through hitting my head against the wall, through failure, as we all seem to have a prevailing idea: “this will never happen to me…”, or “I will be so unlucky if this was to happen to me…” or even worse sometimes we have no idea that something outside of our plan can happen. The unexpected is a pain, it messes up all your plans, schedule, budgets and on and on.
I have experienced all these moments and this is what allows me to share with you many of my insights on this topic. Even though I am often asked a generic question so many times – isn’t the unexpected that changes our lives? – Well for me, I feel uncomfortable, and I can actually state categorically I do not like the surprise effect, I don’t like surprises.
A surprise means that I was either unprepared for the situation/moment, or that something was completely outside my control and therefore beyond my capability of action and this pisses me off! hahahahahahhahaha
Well, for things that are beyond my control, the solution is simple: train to let go and accept! If you did everything you could have done, if you prepare yourself obsessively, and even then something happened beyond your control then the only thing you can do is accepting that external forces defined the moment! However, this can only happen if you can be certain that you did everything you could have done, so this doesn’t become often an excuse.
On the other hand, how about preventing the unexpected? There are a few actions you can take to help prevent the unexpected, I will share a couple of tips that have really worked for me. I have learned them through my mistakes…
Talking specifically to entrepreneurs, as these tips are really relevant at work or for relationships and even for your sports – remember that life works interconnected and not in separate and completely distinct blocks, that you can pause while you execute a task from another area of your own life too. But this is another important lesson I learnt from life hahahahaha, we will talk about it maybe in another moment.
The first tip is planning. Plan, plan everything, plan exhaustively. The more time you spend planning the easier it’s going to be to avoid the unexpected. I’ll go even further, create several different scenarios A, B, C, D… Z. Ask for advice from people more experienced in planning before you begin your enterprise, accept suggestions from these people. Listen to everything they have to say, add these variables to your plans. When you feel that you have everything ready, then create optimistic, standard and pessimistic scenarios for each plan you created. This should reduce significantly the surprises…
Another tip that I can share is too expect life to be cyclical. What does this mean? Do you know the feeling of déjà vu? Well, that’s it! Life is often times cyclical, things tend to repeat themselves. What I mean with this, is that we need to stop thinking in a certain way – “Oh this won’t happen to me again!”. We need to be very aware and register the moments, so you may not weep over them (this is one of the key factors in entrepreneurial life, if you cannot deal with it maybe you’re not cut out to be an entrepreneur). Instead, we should use our experience from these situations, so that we can deal better with similar situations in the future. In fact, the situations may be identical. Life is cyclical. People may change, places may change, but if the circumstances are alike, start preparing yourself and prevent it…
Finally, another fantastic tool is your intuition. However this is a topic which is rather abstract, broad and that requires specific training, we’ll tackle this on another post.
Okay, In summary plan, plan, plan, have a lot of solutions already thought – just in case. Remember that whatever has taken place in the past will likely repeat itself, train your intuition and if you don’t know how to do it, let me know so I can teach you something about your intuitive capabilities.
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